On first sight it looks like a Purim schpiel or perhaps an early April 1 jape, but the square watermelon was advertised by St John’s Wood food hall, Panzer’s is real.
And the minute I saw it on the Instagram account of one of northwest London’s most iconic food shops, I was tapping out a message to them.
“We’re bringing in four this week from Japan, but they’re already sold” Muzahid Islam, fruit and vegetable expert at the uppmarket greengrocer/deli/supermarket, which has been co-owned by David Josephs since 2015 . “We’re hoping to receive between six and eight next week.” You’ll need to be fast to get your teeth into one.
Apparently the oddly angular fruits were developed in the 1970’s by an artist named Tomoyuki Ono and are only grown in the city of Zentusji. “There are farmers who grow only these watermelons.”
Not much of a product range, although perhaps less surprising when I learn the cultivation is highly intensive — which adds up to a price tag per fruit (which weighs in at around 6kg) is £225. The limited supply is partly down to this year’s harvest window being limited to two weeks this year down to climate issues.
They are also in demand in Japan where giving costly fruits as gifts is a mark of respect — the higher the price, the greater your gratitude. Other fruits that attract a high price tag are strawberries that are grown on their own plants — one berry per plant
The shape is formed by growing them in a clear sided box so they can still benefit from daylight, and they must be harvested at the right moment to ensure perfect ripeness. I’m assured they taste like a regular watermelon, although, at that price point I’m unlikely to tucking into one.
Who is buying them? Apparently social media influencers have been quick to show interest. And the deli is launching a new Japanese-inspired area as part of their refurbishment — its first since a huge facelift in 2017 turned it from the old-fashioned family-owned grocers stocking bagels and salmon into the shiny food hall it is today.
The Panzer’s cube isn’t the first square watermelon to hit our shores. In 2006, Tesco launched their own — grown especially in Brazil so they would not roll around in our fridges, but I can see no sign of them now so they clearly didn’t catch on.
For those of us buying regular watermelons, I ask Musahid for his tips on how to work out if our watermelon is going to ripe and juicy or pale and dry. Is the urban myth doing the rounds on social media about measuring the thickness of the darker lines — which should be at least the thickness of two fingers — down their sides accurate?
“No, the way to tell if they are sweet is to tap them — they should sound hollow — and there should also be some yellow stripes to show it has had enough sunlight. That’s still not going to be 100 percent accurate” he admits, suggesting that I should buy Panzer’s Italian watermelons (at £3.50 per kilo) which are specially grown to be sweet and juicy.
The store refurb will be complete in the autumn when they will be launching their Japanese range — so perhaps my Rosh Hashanah new fruit this year will be something very special.
