Some people may be in a season of singleness following the end of a long-term relationship. Others may never have experienced a relationship before, so have been holding down the fort in single land for quite a while.

Thankfully, occupying space in single territory is rent free or I’d have a hefty bill to pay.

Don’t get me wrong, being single is pretty great. I love being in charge of my own happiness and have welcomed being able to dedicate time to working out what makes me tick. I have an openness when meeting new people and a richer relationship with myself.

Then there is the freedom to make decisions (big or small) without having to think about how they may affect someone else. Fancy moving to New York? Go for it. Want to take a sabbatical and travel Australia and New Zealand?

With all due respect, as long as work approves the time off then there isn’t anyone to hold you back. Not to mention, I can take up the whole bed and the only person I need to speak to every day (and all day) is my mum.

So, whilst my engaged friends are stressed out planning weddings and appeasing future mother in laws, my main worry is what restaurant I’m going to for brunch on a Sunday.

On the other hand, being in a relationship and falling in love is lush. You feel like you’re floating on clouds of pure happiness and finding partnership in life is exciting and has its own adventures.

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Being in a relationship and falling in love is lush

But the best part is actually when the honeymoon period is over, and your relationship strengthens. When the reality of sharing your single self with someone else feels normal, it is momentous.

Finding someone who complements you rather than completes you is a huge comfort and to be able to share the woo hoos and boo hoos of life together is fulfilling.

So, am I saying being single and being in a relationship both have their own perks?
Well yes and no as this is where it gets tricky.

Striking the balance between embracing single life and feeling ready to be in a relationship is important, especially in your twenties.

It is empowering that living life solo forces you to expedite the acceptance of being alone, but only for limited time.

It’s important to leave space for a partner to join your world. I remember vividly on a night out with a bunch of my single girlfriends, one of my girls showed up with her dress half zipped up (she couldn’t reach the top).

One of my other friends announced that she’d bought a gadget that can zip a dress up for you, so she didn’t need anyone to help her.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to get too good at being alone. Single folks, enjoy it but you must keep some space available in your heart, mind and life, and maybe leave your dress a little unzipped so that when you do eventually meet the right one, they can have your back (quite literally).