Man in the kitchen: shwarma for cheats

A t some point during an alcohol-fuelled evening out with friends, a man’s thoughts inevitably turn to shwarma — the Middle Eastern version of the Turkish doner kebab, which has become ubiquitous in Israel.

If you happen to be in a neighbourhood which boasts a kosher Israeli-style takeaway, all you need to do is order and eat. However, if you are miles from such an establishment, you may be desperate enough to cook your own — although truth be told, making your own shwarma does have inherent difficulties. First you need to source around 20 kilos of meat — Israelis tend to favour turkey. Then you will need to slice the raw meat and build it on to a giant skewer, interspersing layers of turkey with layers of lamb fat until you have a huge hunk resembling an elephant’s foot. Then, pop out to your nearest catering equipment stockist for a commercial size rotisserie, install it in the kitchen and start cooking. The process should take no more than a week.

Alternatively, you could try my cheat’s version. Take some boned, filleted chicken thighs, rub them with a little cumin, coriander, salt and black pepper and place under a pre-heated grill set to the highest setting to cook for five minutes each side.

In the meantime, prepare a finely chopped salad of tomato, cucumber and pickled gherkins and toast a pitta. When the meat is cooked, shred finely with a carving knife for that shwarma effect and place in the pitta with the salad and Israeli tehina sauce.