Let's reshuffle our calendar, Chief Rabbi

So the Chief Rabbi has moved Shabbat UK from its well-accustomed post-chagim slot to the first week of March. And like many traditionalists I am not entirely happy with the change. Just as non-Jews would feel strange drinking mulled wine and eating mince pies in June, I can’t quite imagine going to a sushi and shots kiddush and watching Mill Hill Synagogue’s annual music video when the days are getting longer rather than shorter.

However, as I thought about it some more, two important points occurred to me. Firstly, my reactionary stance is probably misplaced since the October Shabbat UK is a relatively new innovation. Before Hillel II fixed the Jewish calendar in the fourth century, British Jews had no idea when Shabbat UK was coming. It was only pronounced when two witnesses appeared before the Beth Din to testify that they had seen the Shabbat UK ice cream van approaching from the east.

Secondly, it struck me that if the Chief Rabbi has the authority to uproot one of our festivals, then he could do it for all of them. In fact I have a wishlist to present to the Chief Rabbi that I think would improve all our lives.

First, there are many “twice-a-year” Jews who have to come to shul two weeks running on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. This feels cruel. Let’s move Yom Kippur to March so they get half the year off. That said, the greeting would have to change to “Happy New Year and well over the fast in six months’ time”.