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Britain gave my grandmother a refuge – now we must do the same for Afghan women

Each time I hear another plea to house or sponsor a refugee, I think of the woman who helped my grandmother

August 4, 2022 09:44
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DULLES, VIRGINIA - AUGUST 27: Refugees arrive at Dulles International Airport after being evacuated from Kabul following the takeover by the Taliban of Afghanistan August 27, 2021 in Dulles, Virginia. Refugees continued to arrive in the United States one day after twin suicide bombings at the gates of the airport in Kabul killed 13 U.S. military service members and nearly 100 Afghans. “We will not forgive,” President Joe Biden warned ISIS, who claimed responsibility for the attacks. “We will not forget. We will hunt you down and make you pay.” (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)
3 min read

A few years ago I reconnected with Mary, one of my Hungarian grandmother’s first British friends. I knew Mary had been close to my grandmother in the years when both were raising children, but in practice I knew little about her or what, other than nappies and nurseries, might have forged their bond. So I asked her to remind me how they had first met. “Oh, that’s simple,” Mary told me. “It was when your grandmother was still a displaced refugee. I co-signed her UK visa.”

I was confused. I knew my maternal grandmother had spent time displaced throughout Europe in the aftermath of the Shoah, tracking down the locations of her surviving scattered relatives. But I had never realised that Mary, a very ordinary Englishwomen, had been one of the people who guaranteed her good behaviour if granted entry to the UK.

Mary had even committed to underwrite my grandmother financially, lest she become a burden to the British state. “But surely, you had met her before you made that commitment?” I queried. “Oh, no. My friends had met your grandmother abroad, and they wrote to me and told me all about her, saying they needed one more British citizen to sign a visa application — and I just thought it was the right thing to do.”

The last few years have brought a litany of conflicts across the globe, and with each a new wave of people displaced by violence. Each time I hear another plea to house or sponsor a refugee, I think of Mary. By putting her name to one set of paperwork, she gave my grandmother a new life in safety. She’s the reason my grandparents could raise three children and four grandchildren as proud British citizens.

The Jewish community across Britain carries legacies in almost every family of flights from persecution. Yet trace these Jewish stories — escapes from fascists, pogroms, or even the Inquisition — and you find that many Jewish families in Britain also have a story of their own Mary. No wonder that the Jewish community has been in the vanguard of Britain’s recent efforts to welcome refugees.

Yet our country hasn’t always got it right on helping persecuted groups escape in time. The Jewish community, with our memory of the times we were turned away, knows this well. This August will mark a year since Operation Pitting, the British government’s chaotic attempt to airlift vulnerable people out of Afghanistan during the fall of Kabul. Operation Pitting took place in desperate circumstances. It is clear that many were left behind, including people who had worked closely with British organisations and members of the groups most vulnerable to Taliban persecution.