Q Dear Yente, everyone tells me my partner and I look alike! Should I be worried?
A People often ask me, what’s it like being a matchmaker? The number of times I’ve been told this is my calling in life, or that I must have been born with a gift to set people up is in the double figures. I mean yes, I’m incredibly proud of the 11 successful relationships to date, however, I can confirm that I’ve also set up some very dud matches in my time. I tell all my clients, if it’s a bad date it’s a great story, and if it’s a good date you can thank me later.
Ultimately, I’m not a magician and I don’t have a magical power and while I like to think my intuition has been the result of some of my success stories there are other factors that come into play. Whether that be the information shared on someone’s signup form, the phone call I have with each client or the photos of themselves that they share with me I’ve learnt some matchmaking tricks along the way. When people tell me they’ve always fancied dabbling in some matchmaking but don’t know where to start, my advice is to take a good look at all of your single friends’ faces.
Analyse their features from eye colour to chin shapes to teeth —you want to be fully aware of their facial structure. The reason being is that I passionately believe that couples, soulmates if you will, look alike.
I was at a Friday night Shabbat dinner recently and I looked around at the couples in the room and — I kid you not— every pair resembled each other. A part of me was freaked out by this but the other part found it comforting. As a single person, despite all the complexities one feels about dating at the moment, it made it all feel quite simple. I just haven’t found a fella that looks like me!
I hear there are scientific facts that support this surprisingly controversial opinion of mine but in all honesty, I’ve conducted my own practical research and I don’t need the data, I am satisfied with what I’ve found. Whilst some couples’ resemblances develop over time, through shared life experiences, others look alike from the beginning of their relationship. I know it challenges the ‘opposites attract’ notion, but there is this phenomenon that we are subconsciously attracted to people who look like ourselves. Not to mention, that also means genetically so no wonder so many Jewish people date within the community.
So, if you are in a relationship, stand in front of the mirror with your partner and do some face-to-face analysis.
If, however, you are in the dating pool, and on the lookout for your soulmate, you need to start searching for someone who looks like you.
And finally, if you are trying your hand at some matchmaking, this is a mysterious yet highly lucrative ‘science’ behind long lasting couples so don’t be afraid to put on your matchmaking hat and test out this trick.