It’s often said that compromise is key to a happy marriage.
If that’s true, newlyweds Davina Finn, 30, and David Hecht, 32, must be destined for a life of bliss after tying the knot on the US-Canadian border.
The bride, who has relatives in the UK, is originally from Canada but lives and works in the United States, where she met her husband at a Jewish community centre in 2017.
Mr Hecht, who proposed last year in a New York City park overlooking the Hudson River, said the couple had secured a venue, caterer, band and even accommodation for around 250 guests.
But when the border shut down to all non-essential travel in March, they feared they may have to postpone their wedding or contemplate a virtual service.
Instead, Ms Finn and her husband stood under a chuppah on US soil, while her Canadian relatives watched from behind the border, which was demarcated with flower pots.
They gathered outside an historic library and opera house straddling both countries for an intimate outdoor ceremony and picnic with around 15 guests held earlier this month.
“We brought folding chairs and we sat, played music, did a dance, gave speeches,” Mr Hecht recalled. “We had some wine and some good food and we hung out for three hours.”
The two families enjoyed being “almost together”, Ms Finn said, but they had to make do without some of the usual hallmarks.
“I wanted to do an Hora and be lifted on chairs but we didn’t have enough manpower.” Instead of the traditional father-daughter dance, they settled for an air-dance, and Ms Finn’s relatives had to bring their own food, which could not be passed across the border.
“It was as good as we could do under the circumstances, but of course in an ideal world we would have had my parents under the chuppah, be walked down the aisle, had my mum getting ready with me,” she said.
The ceremony was broadcast online and watched remotely by over 100 online users including Ms Finn’s 84-year-old grandmother, who lives in Ottawa and invited family members for an outdoor live-stream viewing party.
“She really felt she was able to be part of the wedding and my extended family was able to celebrate together, even though we were not physically there,” her grand-daughter said.
The newlyweds had planned to spend their honeymoon in Sri Lanka but after the trip was cancelled due to the pandemic they opted to spend 10 days in Maine. “It forced us to explore the country that we were living in,” the bride said.
For Mr Hecht, there was “something special about making do with what we have and the reality of the world instead of putting things off with uncertainty.
“We got to spend a lot of quality time with our parents and siblings and if we had a huge 250 person wedding, I don’t know how much time we would have been sitting down with just our parents,” Ms Finn said. “This is our new combined family and it was nice just to be all together just us.”
