Bereaved IDF widow discovers she is pregnant the day after husband’s shiva

Unable to come to terms with it, Racheli told no one of the pregnancy for nearly half a year. “I didn’t look pregnant and because I barely leave my apartment, no one was any the wiser.”

One of the first people she did tell was Idan Siboni, Saadia’s commanding officer. Since Saadia’s death, Siboni had become not only one of Racheli’s few confidants but also a care giver. Siboni, along with fellow soldiers from Saadia’s elite Alexandroni Brigade, ensured Racheli’s needs were met, including delivering weekly groceries and organising a birthday celebration for the couple’s three-year-old.

“Saadia was the best friend anyone could ask for,” Siboni said. His wedding, slated to take place in November 2023, was postponed when the war broke out and Siboni was called up to the front lines. But at Saadia’s insistence - and aligning with the Jewish tradition of not delaying weddings – the platoon decided to hold a small Sheva Brachot ceremony for Siboni and his wife. Saadia took it upon himself to manage the event. “He reminded me that, according to tradition, a groom should be treated like a king,” Siboni said.

In a video filmed at the event, Saadia can be heard addressing Siboni: “You got married during a time when the people of Israel were reeling from a devastating blow, it’s lowest point ever. But now, we see how Israel is rising again, how much people are coming together to help and support us. I get tears in my eyes every time I see these things. The sweet notes sent to me by kindergarten children are in my pocket all the time. Your wedding is part of this rebuilding, a step toward something greater and more complete.”

Now, more than a year after his wedding, Siboni said he felt duty bound to repay the favour. “Just as he was there for me and my wife, I need to be there for Racheli and the children.”

Racheli described her father’s death – two years before she met Saadia — as leaving a void she never thought she’d fill – until she met Saadia.

“From the moment I met Saadia, I knew this was it. I felt like he brought life back to me. He became my whole world,” she said

According to Siboni, every conversation with Racheli since her husband’s death has revolved around how central he was to her identity. He recounted encouraging her to regain a sense of independence, suggesting she take time for herself or go out with friends. “Her response was always the same: ‘Those are things I only did with Saadia. Without him, I am nothing,’” Siboni said. Challenging her self-doubt, he said, by reminding her that Saadia – a rabbinical student, a university student, a bar mitzvah teacher, an aide for autistic children being just a few of the many hats he wore – would not have married someone without her strength and capabilities, struck a chord.

For Siboni and the others in the platoon, their commitment to supporting their fallen brother-in-arms posthumously held as much meaning as the missions they had undertaken on the battlefield.

“They say ‘never leave a man behind’, and it’s true. For 15 months we’ve fought almost nonstop, first on the northern border, then in Gaza, and finally in Lebanon. Looking after Racheli is our fourth mission,” he said.

“Being a commander means making choices that are often life or death. In Saadia’s case, it was both — he gave his life, but he also left behind a new life. I can’t bring Saadia back - and for that, I can never say sorry enough - but I can make it my duty, and all of our duty, to build a better future for her and their children,” he added.

The platoon’s “fourth mission” comes in the form of a crowdfunding campaign launched last week, with the aim of buying an apartment for Racheli. On the first day of its launch, more than a million shekels was raised. Racheli currently lives in a cramped flat of 45 square meters and no safe room, forcing her to take her children downstairs and into the bomb shelter with other neighbours during missile sirens.

“It’s just not tenable in the long term,” Siboni said. “Now is the time to make sure her material needs are taken care of. It’s also part of our promise to Saadia.”

According to Siboni, Saadia seemed to be “aware, on some level, that he wouldn’t make it.”

“He told us, ‘I don’t know what will happen, but if something does happen to me, promise me you’ll take care of Racheli and the children,” he said.

Racheli said she was overwhelmed at the dedication shown to her by the platoon.

“It deeply moves me that they are fulfilling Saadia’s request to take care of me and the children. They were the ones who initiated and launched the campaign, they are the ones driving and managing it, and their care and devotion touches my heart,” she said.

“While I’ll never fulfil my dream of building a home with Saadia, and this will never stop being painful, at least I can build one for his children.”

The crowdfunder can be found here.