Chief Rabbi publishes ground-breaking guidance for Orthodox schools on LGBT+ pupils

Commenting on its publication, the Chief Rabbi said he believed the document was “an extremely significant milestone and will have a real and lasting impact on reducing harm to LGBT+ Jews across the Orthodox Jewish community. 

“Our children need to know that at school, at home and in the community, they will be loved and protected regardless of their sexuality or gender identity.”

Dalia Fleming, KeshetUK executive director, said the organisation was proud of its involvement in the project and now looked forward “to working with schools, rabbis and educators across Jewish communities, supporting them to implement this guide so they can ensure their LGBT+ students reach their potential, free from homophobic, biphobic and transphobic bullying, discrimination and fear”.

In his introduction, the Chief Rabbi paid tribute to the organisation, which had been “totally respectful of Torah values, never seeking to undermine or contradict any issurim (prohibitions)) or important areas of hashkafa (religious outlook).”

He considered it an obligation to provide direction to schools because too often harm had been caused.

While not all LGBT+ students suffered from bullying, it was “clear that many do,” the guide states. Anyone who doubts “there are young LGBT+ people in our schools who have been left feeling so isolated that their very lives are in danger, has simply failed to grasp the reality confronting some of our students”.

School policies should carry an explicit commitment to the “welfare of LGBT+ pupils” and all staff should have at least a basic understanding of this.

The guide sets out a number of Torah values which should underpin its approach such as taking care of the way one’s speaks to others.

“The struggle to understand one’s sexual identity is particularly challenging at secondary school. Pupils who are LGBT+ have particular struggles, and more so within faith schools,” the guide says.

“Gender roles are assumed, heterosexual relationships are talked about and those whose sexual orientation is different can begin to question their place within the school community and their faith community.”

It also details the experience of  LGBT+ Jews. One, Shulli, who came out only after she had left school, recalled how she had thought “by fitting in and acting straight, then I would eventually become straight …  I knew I had to mention boy crushes, I had to get rid of my swaggering walk, I had to frequently use homophobic slurs, and I couldn’t wear my football shirt on Israel tour.”

Another ex-Jewish day school pupil said a teacher “not knowing I am gay, made a throwaway remark that stayed with me and hurt a lot. He said, ‘I’d sit shivah for my son if he came out’.”

But it also records some positive practice. One parent with children at an Orthodox school said: “Even though people there know I’m lesbian, I’ve never experienced anything but respect from all the staff at the school.”

A former pupil said it had meant a lot when a rabbi said that he was there just to listen because he didn’t have all the answers.

“It felt like he showed a lot of humility, was being honest and cared about me. There are a lot of knotty areas and sometimes just acknowledging that and showing that you are aware of the impact makes a huge difference.”