When cuddles only end in tears

"It's seen as a reflection of your skills as a parent, which is nonsense," she insists.

Conversely, if your baby does sleep through the night you become the envy of all your fellow parents.

"People don't want to admit that they have got a problem," Gurney adds. "It can become quite competitive."

But since all babies are different, making comparisons is pointless.

"Temperament has a huge role to play in children's sleep," says Gurney. "The more feisty the child, the more likely they are to have sleep problems. With young babies, you have got issues like colic, reflux and food allergies. And there are certain babies who won't slip into routines."

Gurney does suggest trying to implement a bedtime routine from three months which is not necessarily as strict as Gina Ford's - the childcare expert whose advice splits parents. Popular as she is, she has also come under fire from some, including Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg. Instead, Gurney recommends a schedule that fits in with family life.

"To regulate body clocks, you do need to have some structure," suggests Gurney. "It does not need to be Gina Ford. It can be what works for you as a family."

Another controversial technique suggested by Ford is "controlled crying", which sounds harsh but if done properly, should sort out poor sleeping habits in a matter of days.

"Controlled crying does not mean that you abandon your baby to their tears but instead you return to briefly check them at set intervals to reassure your baby and yourself," says Gurney, who does not recommend the technique for children under six months. "The length of time between visits is gradually increased until your baby is asleep. The key to this technique is not to stroke, pat or re-position your baby. This type of contact could be seen as a reward for crying and instead of reducing the crying could teach your child to cry for a set period knowing that you will cuddle or stroke them."

After two or three gruelling nights with hours of crying, Gurney insists your baby should be able to settle himself independently. But she warns against using aids like dummies or rocking motions for sleep as it is important for a child to "self settle".

"Creating inappropriate sleeping associations like rocking, feeding or lying with them is dangerous because when babies come into a light sleep phase they will need those same connections put back in place," she says. "They need to know how to get to sleep without those props."

How to get your baby to sleep

● Establish a regular bedtime. This helps eliminate bedtime battles with your child.
● Stick to a set routine. This might include quiet play, a bath, a story, then lights out and a purposeful "goodnight". It should take no longer than 45 minutes.
● Enforce clear boundaries at bedtime. Once boundaries start to become stretched, most children will push them even more.
● Place a baby in her cot when she is drowsy, not asleep. If your baby can get used to falling asleep without your presence, she is likely to wake and demand you far less frequently.
● Do not rely on props. When your baby wakes at night, she needs to be able to get back to sleep without cuddles or dummies.
● 15 minute rule. This is the maximum amount of time it should take your child to fall asleep. Any longer and he may be having a nap too late in the afternoon – or a too stimulating bedtime routine.
● Keep daytime naps regular and consistent in length.
● Create the right sleep environment - children sleep better in a cool bedroom.