Despite being far from the movie star aesthetic, I won the role of Adrian in the West End version of The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole Aged 13 ¾ at the age of 16.
I moved to London, and fell into a life of shows at night, free time during the day. It was a bizarre and exciting new routine, feeling old before my years, and rather cosmopolitan.
During one of these days I stumbled across an indie cinema, and one fateful day I wandered into a double bill of Manhattan and Annie Hall. I sat mesmerised as a man different from all the other movie stars would stumble and stutter his way through absurdist realities, winning the love of the beautiful girl and make the audience collapse in laughter.
I felt an immediate affinity. I'd found my hero, someone who, like me, used humour to survive life.
After years of watching his movies, obsessively dissecting every word, my brother bought me the tape of Woody's live stand-up from the early 1960s. I came to know these tapes back to front, quoting lines to my brother, The Moose becoming a personal favourite. I could feel myself performing these routines, for years before I got the guts to actually do it.
My life went on, acting in TV and commercials, getting a chance to practise my American accent in such projects as Band of Brothers. However, always in the background were my Woody routines.
But it wasn't until last year that I finally made the decision to take what I knew by heart and literally become him. I found the outfit, I found the glasses. All I needed was the audience.
Earlier this year my girlfriend was having a meeting with our rabbi at our shul, Muswell Hill Synagogue, which ended in her texting me saying "I got you a gig for Woody! After the Megillah reading on Purim."
What a great start I thought, how much more Jewish could you get?
On the night I stood in the corridor outside the loos, the hall sounded like it was full of thousands of people, the clatter of a post Magillah feast would be what I had to compete with. Would the fact I was Woody-ish be enough?
When the rabbi, dressed as a rastafarian, introduced me, I stumbled into the hall. I was met with the expectant faces of 150 Jews all in fancy dress. I thought: "Even Woody couldn't write this…this is totally bizarre!"
I made it through the routine, at the beginning I suddenly understood why Woody hated doing his stand up, having to be pushed onto stage.
But as I got my first laughs, I relaxed, I truly felt I was channeling Woody, giving his excellent writing a new breath of life.
All the hours spent studying his mannerisms and learning his speech more phonetically than word by word had paid off. People loved it!
After the Purim gig, I performed a few more sets, one at Nightingale House in Clapham, which once again was a truly unique experience, a short set at Jew Come Here Often, a fantastic evening of Jewish comedy and entertainment at the Groucho Club, as well as two sell-out and fantastically received shows in London.
Every time I donned the geeky suit and the famous glasses, I feel Woody coming to life. When I hear the laughs at the material I found to be such a comfort in my formative years, I feel so honoured to be able to share this exceptional material with a new audience as well as giving old Woody fans like myself a good dose of nostalgia.
I am now on the cusp of my first Edinburgh adventure. Playing for 10 days at Frankenstein. And honestly I cant wait to see what other bizarre, fun and truly Woody ish experiences this performance will bring!
Simon Schatzberger is appearing as Woody in "Lunchtime with Woody Allen(ish)" at Frankenstein, George IV Bridge, Edinburgh, at 1pm and 3.30pm daily. For more information and details of his future gigs, go to: www.woodyallenish.com.
