For many people planning a simchah, it has to be in Israel, even if they don’t live there. In Israel, their day feels even more special, with that strong sense of connection to the Jewish state.
But for those organising a celebration right now, is it still the obvious choice?

Absolutely, says British-born simchah planner Karen Tsafrir, of Live Productions. “Don’t leave us when we need you,” she says. “The industry was so badly hit by Covid – and to be hit by this [war] is devastating. The centre of Israel is as safe as it is when you’re not at war. And if you’re going to be in a war zone, we are sadly experienced.”

(Tsafrir has also begun to offer weddings in nearby Cyprus, using as many Israeli suppliers as possible.)

For some simchah hosts, celebrating in Israel is still a no-brainer, says Tsafrir.

“I have a client who’s a doctor from San Francisco. When he was 75 he celebrated the anniversary of his bar mitzvah [with an event in Israel] and when he was 80 he was scheduled to do it again. When he called me [after October 7], I was sure he wasn’t going to come – but he said “We’re coming early; I’m a psychiatric specialist, I want to help; my wife and I want to volunteer.” Not only did they celebrate their simcha – they stayed eight weeks.”

Here are the stories of two couples who made Israel the beautiful backdrop for their special day, even in these troubled times.

JOËLLE & DANIEL

At Joëlle and Daniel Sandberg’s pre-wedding photo shoot, they were greeted by happy crowds including “Arab-Israeli families, students working in restaurants, Jewish couples, old and young; everyone celebrated us and congratulated us in the most cheerful way possible. They were family, without knowing us, they were celebrating us as their own.”

Why were they so at home? Because the shoot was in Israel, in Jaffa.

Joëlle, who works in business development at the global HQ of a large corporation, and Daniel, who is in banking, decided to marry in Israel because “we both have family-ties [there] and Joëlle has always had a strong bond to the country. It was also important to us to show our non-Jewish friends the amazing and unique flavours of Israel.”

They chose their location before October 7. “When… the aftermath in Israel but also in Western countries showed the real face of the political climate (protests on campuses, ignorance against the massacre, etc), it was even more important to us to show our Israeli friends and family that we will not leave them alone,” says Joëlle, and to “bring some joy in this time of darkness and bring our friends and family together in the only safe haven for Jewish people all over the world.” Some guests cancelled, but those who attended were “super happy and felt safe”.

Joëlle and Daniel loved not having to explain Jewish weddings to the Israeli suppliers, who understood what was needed. “We had Karen Tsafrir [of Live Productions] as our wedding planner. She helped us in these difficult times a lot. Further, she was great in navigating and translating our European ways of doing business (everything clearly written down, discussed to the last detail and confirmed in an orderly manner) to the typical laid-back ways of the Middle East/Israelis.”

The wedding was at Chavat Ronit (Ronit Farm), north of Herzliya.

Joëlle and designer Nana Gotti (nanagotti.com) worked together to create three distinct looks, for the chupah, hora and after-party.

“The chupah and hora dancing was the same dress,” explains Joëlle, “but under the chupah I had a laced wedding topper bolero matching my veil. After the chupah I took off the bolero. The dress itself had a plain fabric with a little shimmer, a wide skirt, strapless with some folded detail at the top, combining classic style with a modern twist. The back of the dress was laced and the train was 3m long.

“The after-party dress was also strapless but had a different vibe, more fluttering, airy, with heartline décolletage and a small cut-out on the top of my belly. I had straps that I could tie into bows. The top was fluted and the skirt part was long with a cut up the leg which was only seen if I wanted it.”

Daniel wore a classic black tuxedo until the after-party, then changed into an ivory dinner jacket. His kippah, a gift from his father-in-law, was midnight blue, with an outline of Jerusalem embroidered in silver and gold.

Floral designer Aylona Halperin created a pastel scheme using Israeli-grown flowers only, with a fully floral chupah. The canopy, royal blue with golden Star of David embroidery, was Joëlle’s family chupah from their synagogue in Germany.

Adam Lahav was the (“highly recommended”) chupah singer. The couple chose many Israeli songs, but Joëlle walked down the aisle to Can’t Help Falling in Love With You, matched to the lyrics of the traditional Hebrew Bo’i Kallah, and Daniel walked down to Nothing Else Matters, matched to “kol sason ve kol simcha”. Yerushalayim Shel Zahav was sung just before smashing the glass.

Rabbi Schlomo Raskin from Jerusalem explained key parts of the ceremony “perfectly, in German and Hebrew (with some English). He was funny, loving, and very entertaining. We both have attended several Jewish weddings, and it’s always beautiful as a guest, but… when you are the couple getting married, it hits differently. It made us feel connected and have a deep understanding, realising we are continuing a tradition our parents, grandparents, great grandparents, etc. have done before. This feeling is indescribably amazing.”

The wedding feast included an array of food stations and a wooden taboon, where a baker made fresh focaccias, with toppings such as lamb and tomatoes, and wood roasted vegetables. There were five flavours of bagel, including soft pumpkin bagels with lemon and honey messabecha and pickled lemon cream.

Other treats included pad kapao (chopped chicken or vegan ‘meat’, sautéed with herbs on a metal plancha, served with steamed aromatic rice, hot peppers, pepper Hollandaise and chopped coriander) and arepa (corn bread from the taboon) with chicken or black bean stew cooked in clay pots, chipotles de gallo and pickled onions. Among desserts were malabi, lemon and pistachio pie, mille-feuilles and giant chocolate chip cookies.

Legend by Caliente Band, led by Udi Or-Haim, brought all the guests to the dancefloor, and included a sing-along of emotion-filled Israeli classics.

To anyone planning a wedding in Israel, Joëlle and Daniel say: “Do it! You are only getting married once (hopefully) and to do it in a country where you do not have to explain the Jewish traditions of not only the ceremony but hora, kosher, family dramas and so on is just different.”

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EMILY & SAHAR

“It was incredibly moving to stand under the chupah in Israel during a time like this where Israel is at war,” says doctor Emily Braun Sazgar, who married Sahar, start-up investment consultant at EIT, in Hadera. “Sahar thanked all his army combat team for standing by him during their miluim service, he paid tribute to all our fallen soldiers and prayed for the return of all our hostages. I also pinned my yellow hostage pin to my bouquet of flowers as tribute.” Emily (née Braun), is a doctor in dermatology, training at Sheba Tel Hashomer Hospital. She met Sahar, who now works in the tech and innovation sector, through a mutual friend, when she was studying in Manchester. Sahar was a Jewish Agency shaliach in Prestwich at the time.

“My friend invited me over for shakshuka, and she was there. The rest is history,” says Sahar.

“When we started to discuss our future together and where we would live, I realised how deeply connected Sahar felt to Israel,” says Emily. “I admired and respected his love for Israel. He told me how he quite literally ‘fought for his country’. I realised that Israel is a country we fight for on a daily basis, not only for Israelis but also so that the Jewish people have a homeland and so it made no sense for me not to live there.”

They married at Baya’ar, a wedding venue in a nature reserve. The event was organised by Ori Fass of Fass Productions.

“I was lucky enough to have two beautiful dresses,” says Emily. The first, which had a bespoke shoulder covering to wear at the chupah, was by Galia Lahav, “all lace with a long heavy train. Galia and her team were amazing from start to finish. The whole wedding dress process was a dream, and I felt like a true princess trying on Galia’s beautiful dresses in her stunning boutique store in South Tel Aviv. The first time I tried on my dress, my face lit up with a huge smile and I knew it was ‘the one’… I was lucky enough to meet Galia and have her personally attend some of my fittings… Galia [who has a new store in London’s Mayfair] is a true inspiration.

“My second dress was by Dror Kontento, another talented Israeli designer based in South Tel Aviv. I had an amazingly fun journey with Dror, in a slightly more relaxed and quirky environment yet still professional and to a very high standard. Dror designed me a beautifully simple and elegant second look, that was incredibly light and comfortable to dance the night away in.”

Sahar chose a summery cream linen double-breasted suit from Patron Suits, an elegant suit store in Poleg.

“Bordo Design brought our dream chupah to life,” says Emily. Her mother, Osnat, hand-sewed the chupah cover as a wedding gift; her father, Simon, sang the sheva brachot and Sahar brought everyone to tears with his speech. Singer Yossi Azulay was accompanied by a string quartet and Sahar will always remember “seeing my beautiful bride for the first time. It was a very moving ceremony, especially the moment when Yossi Azulay… sang Im Eshkachech before breaking the glass.”

At dinner, guests could order whatever they wished from a Middle Eastern restaurant-style menu. Reception food included slow-cooked Asado beef, beef-filled pastry with tahini dressing, seared tuna tataki and traditional Moroccan fish.

Main dishes included steak with roasted vegetables, chicken with Oshpelo rice (a traditional central-Asian recipe with onions, carrots and spices), Asian-style salmon, and artichoke cream ravioli. Desserts included classics such as chocolate soufflé and apple crumble, as well as a Middle Eastern spun-pastry dessert, knafeh.

A mix of English and Hebrew music was provided by the band, Legend by Caliente, and DJ Nadav Shpilman. Video for the event was by Moshe Amar Motion.

“During the dancing, we brought out Israeli flags and my army combat team flag that we took into Gaza with us during my miluim service,” says Sahar. “This was a very special moment.”

“Knowing that so many people had come from far and wide during these unstable times made you appreciate them even more and I felt so loved,” says Emily. As she explained in her hafrashat challah speech: “Israelis have the incredible ability to mourn together and hurt together but also when there is something to celebrate they can immediately switch all that pain and suffering into parties and celebrations, celebrating life, love and being Jewish.”

“Even though there is lots of stress and anxiety in Israel at the moment, I wouldn’t have wanted to get married anywhere else and I would recommend others to do the same,” says Sahar. “We cannot let our enemies win.”