I have been in Los Angeles this week at the rock face of the entertainment industry having meetings, talking projects but mainly throwing myself on the grenade of endeavour by attending nearly every Oscars party going.
Packing all the evening gowns in my possession, the night before departure I was in a great mood, humming to myself with excitement. Not so much due to the fact that Elton John's Oscars night awaited me, but more over the fact that George Galloway had just ensured that he will be globally acknowledged as unpleasant. I can still barely wipe the smile from my face as I recall Mr Galloway stomping out of the Blue Boar Lecture Theatre in Oxford spouting the words (apply own Scots accent): "I dannae recognise Isray-el and I dannae debate with Isray-aylees."
Let us all remind ourselves of the incident that has finally rendered Galloway a political pariah once and for all. The Bradford West MP was speaking at a Christ Church college debate in favour of the motion: "Israel should withdraw immediately from the West Bank". Just minutes into a speech from Oxford undergraduate Eylon Aslan-Levy, Galloway interrupted, asking: "You said we. Are you an Israeli?"
When he realised that his co-debater was from the land of Jaffa oranges he stormed out. How marvellous that the man who once openly, some might say warmly, embraced murderous tyrant Sadaam Hussein, should have such staunch views on who he will share a platform with. Galloway, not content with having made a national joke of himself on Celebrity Big Brother, is now facing national recognition all over again - this time for his behaviour toward a student.
Pity poor medical student Mahmood Najii, the debate organiser. He says he was looking forward to Gorgeous George giving one of his passionate arguments for the Palestinian cause but is now horrified and let down, not least embarrassed at the cowardly display. Galloway insists that he should have been told up front that one of his panellists was an "Isray-aylee". Mr Najii argues that has a much relevance as him being told that one of the panellists was a vegetarian.
The Oscars are like one really giant barmitzvah
With friends like Galloway, the Palestinians may want to search around for better allies.
So having seen Galloway royally hang himself, I breezily entered the crazy, marvellous world of the Oscars. At one point, eating my sushi standing between Russell Crowe, Hugh Jackman, Warren Beatty and my personal favourite Bryan Cranston, with Samuel L Jackson and Steven Spielberg leaning over each other for the vegetarian dumplings, I was struck by the fact that I was in the living, breathing version of Madame Tussauds.
My main observation was that the Oscars are like one giant barmitzvah. All the parties, all the eating, all the dresses. Elton John's Oscar Viewing Party, which is a dinner during the Academy Awards themselves, was exactly like a glitzy north west London Sunday night bash. Albeit with better made up faces. Slightly better.