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Rabbi I Have a Problem

Will Jewish life change as a result of coronavirus?

An Orthodox and a Reform rabbi discuss issues in contemporary Jewish life

June 29, 2020 09:06
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QUESTION: As we emerge from lockdown, is there anything about Jewish life you think will, or should, change?

Rabbi Brawer: I think two remarkable changes have occurred as a result of the lockdown and, to a greater or lesser extent, they ought to be incorporated into Jewish life going forward.

The first is the impact social distancing has had on the celebration of simchahs. Bar/batmitzvahs and weddings have been revolutionised. All external trappings; a fancy hall, photographer, band, expensive flowers and extensive catering have been stripped away. While such extreme curtailment is certainly not ideal, it does invite fresh thinking about what is important and what is trivial. 

I recognise that many businesses and livelihoods depend on the simchah industry and they provide value at important moments in people’s lives. I also recognise tastes and budgets vary widely. Still, I think the community would benefit from reassessing expectations and norms, which have steadily increased over the years. 

It’s not just a quantitative reassessment — in terms of how much is spent—  that is called for, but a qualitative one. How does a family’s celebration reflect their deepest values? A couple getting married may decide to invite a smaller crowd, or forgo other luxuries trappings and donate the money saved to feed the hungry, or to use it as a down payment on their future home.

Would it really be so terrible if occasionally families chose to pray at home?
 

Another positive impact of social distancing is the way in which parents have had to engage Jewishly with their children in far more direct ways than previously. In the absence of synagogue services with outsourced children’s programming, families have had to pray together at home. While there is certainly much to be said, both halachically and socially, for praying with a minyan, there are advantages to intimate family prayer. Would it really be so terrible if occasionally families chose to pray at home instead of attending services in synagogue? 

Likewise, for those accustomed to socialising over Shabbat and festival meals, children can often get shunted aside. Adults typically remain at the table, while children are excused to run off and play. Lockdown has meant parents have had to converse with their children over the Shabbat table.

After the lockdown, it would benefit families to balance socialising with time alone. However, not everyone lives within a family. Lockdown has been cruel and challenging for those who live alone, particularly during Shabbat and Jewish festivals, and for them, the lifting of social distancing cannot come soon enough.