We are in the month of Ellul, the time of preparation for Rosh Hashanah and a time for restoring and renewing our souls, the process of teshuvah, literally “return”.   To go through our year and work out how to live a better life takes some time, some focus, some internal energy.

Ki Tetzei begins by discussing the rules of warfare, how you should behave when you are facing your enemy; but in Chasidic thought, our enemies are really all the distractions that stop us from doing the deep work we need to do — the small worries, the news, the social media feeds, gossip. It’s easy to get caught up in them.   It’s a struggle to even begin the process of trying to be a better person.

The first test in this parashah comes not from losing this battle, but from winning it. On the surface level of this text, when we win the battle, there is a danger we might try to take a beautiful woman who has become our captive, own her and when we are tired of her, sell her. What the Torah commands instead is that we establish a relationship with her, see her for who she really is and only then come to her.

Who or what is the “captive bride” for us? When might winning a battle leave us so morally compromised that we risk falling victim to our worst instincts?

We live in a world of consumerism.  Not only that, we live in a world where many of us have a ridiculous array of choices — different kinds of food, clothes, entertainment options — while others have to choose between eating and heating. And we know that our over-consumption over the decades has taken its toll on the earth.  Consumerism teaches that everything is there to be bought and owned.

The “captive bride” is the commodification of our earth. When everything can be marketed, everything bought, everything sold, then it’s hard to notice the space between things — and God exists in the spaces in between.  We need to rebalance our relationship with the world around us — and this is the month to do it.