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Family & Education

My son's going to be barmitzvah...but what does it mean?

Susan Reuben ponders the point of the rite of passage

November 30, 2017 13:13
It's not just about the party...
3 min read

In six months’ time, our oldest child will have his barmitzvah. As the weeks go by, we become increasingly immersed in the practicalities — teaching Haftarah tropes and choosing a party venue, designing invitations and practising aliyot. And most importantly of all, signing the “Sweet-Throwing Waiver Form”. That really is a thing in our synagogue, designed to avoid litigious action should a congregant be injured by a flying jelly bean.

As all this happens, I find myself wondering what this barmitzvah business is really about.

In literal terms, the answer is pretty clear — it’s the age when, according to Jewish law, a boy is considered to be an adult, responsible for fulfilling the Torah’s commandments. And of course, exactly the same applies to a batmitzvah girl.

This is all very well, but what, in an actual, realistic, day-to-day sense, does it mean?